


sincerely yours

by thecivilunrest



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-22
Updated: 2014-11-22
Packaged: 2018-02-26 13:35:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2653931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecivilunrest/pseuds/thecivilunrest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dear Rin, </p><p>Why do you never write?</p><p>Haru</p>
            </blockquote>





	sincerely yours

**Author's Note:**

> for rinharu week day three. 
> 
> big thanks to my tlist for looking this over for me when i was iffy about it and for encouraging me to actually finish it. you're all the best <3

_Dear Rin,_

_This is stupid. Letters are stupid and I don’t have much to tell you other than I’m angry at you._

_I’m angry at you for being so annoying. I’m angry at you for never shutting up about the relay. I’m angry at you for being so selfish._

_But mostly I’m just angry at you because I can’t tell you in person how angry I am, so I have to write this stupid letter._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_Why do you never write?_

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_Sousuke came over today. He showed me the letter that you sent him about me. For me. Whichever._

_You really need to get better at erasing._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_I don’t think about you most days, even though sometimes it’s like I can’t escape the fact that other people knew you too.  
I don’t miss you either, but today I thought I saw a sakura petal floating on a puddle, and I don’t know what that means. I asked my grandmother and she didn’t know either, since it’s autumn and all the blossoms have fallen. All I could think about was how you wanted to swim in a pool of cherry blossoms, even though that’s an annoying idea. _

_Guess the sakura petal meant something after all._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

 

_Dear Rin,_

_I was happy to see you, at the railroad crossing. I didn’t think I would be, but I was._

_I really wish that you had called._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_Did you mean it, when you said you were done with swimming?_

_Haru_

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.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_I quit the swim club today._

_Makoto did too, even though he did it after me, like he didn’t want me to see him do it. Another person who quit swimming because of me._

_Coach was disappointed in me. He asked me if I was sure twice, and when I said yes the second time he just sighed. I didn’t care about that, though._

_I just don’t see the point in swimming alone._

_Anyway, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, but I thought you would want to know._

_Haru_

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.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_I miss the swim club. Mom finally left the prefecture to go be with dad, so now it’s just me and my grandmother. I don’t mind that much. I knew she was going to leave some day._

_I wish I had known the same about you._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_My grandma told me this today:_ When you’re ten, they call you a prodigy. When you’re fifteen, they call you a genius. Once you hit twenty, you’re just an ordinary person. _I think it makes a lot of sense._

_I can’t wait until I’m ordinary._

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_Grandmother died today._

_Haru_

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.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_My parents talked to Makoto more than they talked to me at the funeral. I think that’s because he’s easier for them to understand. I think they know that I’m angry at them, and they don’t know what to say._

_That’s okay. I don’t know what to say to them either._

_Haru_

.  
.  
. 

_Dear Rin,_

_I hate winter._

_It was okay when I had the pool, but I can’t swim there now that I quit. I just sit in the bath instead, and wait for summer._

_It’s fine. It’s all fine. I think that’s the problem._

_Haru_

.  
.  
. 

_Dear Rin,_

_I don’t know why I started writing to you anyway. I’m not very good at words, and I don’t have much to say. At least I never sent any of these._

_I know I’m never going to see you again, so I just want you to know that I didn’t mean to make you quit swimming. I wish I didn’t have to watch you leave not once, but twice._

_Sometimes I think about what things would be like if you had stayed. If things would be as ordinary as they are now._

_If you had stayed, would ordinary have been inevitable?_

_Haru_

.  
.  
.

_Dear Rin,_

_You’re back, so I won’t write any more letters._

_You’re back, but I don’t think I know you anymore._

_Haru_

 

Rin came upon the box completely by accident. 

Haru had gotten up to go get a glass of water, which meant that Rin was left to his own devices. When his game of flipping his pencil resulted in said pencil rolling under the bed, he went to follow it and found a box instead. 

There was no lid, which showed the envelopes which were lined neatly in a row. They were all unsealed, and on the front they all had Rin’s name, written in English letters, and nothing else. 

Rin contemplated not reading any of them, but he knew the curiosity would annoy him for weeks. Trying to squash the guilt, Rin took the first letter out of the envelope. 

Reading them didn’t take long. They were short, typical Haru, but every word made Rin’s heart feel heavier.

He still had the last letter in his hand when Haru walked back in. “What are you doing?” he asked. He didn’t sound angry, but Rin still didn’t want to look at him, in case he saw how upset Rin was. 

“Oh,” Haru said, when he finally saw the open box. “I forgot that I still had these.” 

“They were addressed to me,” Rin said, his voice defensive and rough, finally turning to Haru. Haru didn’t seem bothered at all as he went to grab the first letter. 

“I don’t mind that you read them.” Haru shrugged, putting the first letter back into the envelope and taking the second out of the box. “I don’t feel this way anymore.” 

“Why did you never send them?” 

“I would have,” Haru said, “but you didn’t give any of us an address, and you never wrote.” 

Not for the first time, Rin felt a stab of guilt when he thought about just how effectively he had cut off his old friends. He’d only written to Sousuke because he wanted to prove to the Iwatobi team just how much better he had gotten when he came back. What a load of crap. 

“I’m sorry,” Rin said, because that was the only thing that he could say when faced with the reality of how much he hurt Haru. He spent all that time thinking that Haru didn’t care, when it really was the opposite. 

Haru leaned in and kissed Rin on the mouth, lingering there until Rin’s heart stopped aching so much. “I already told you, it doesn’t matter anymore. We’re together now, Rin, and I love you. We’re not who we were back then.” 

It always took Rin by surprise when Haru told him that he loved him. Felt like a punch in the gut, like all the wind was taken out of his lungs, every time. 

“I know,” Rin whispered back, and kissed Haru again to hide the blush on his face.


End file.
